Elf is a dumb movie, but that's okay

Elf is one of the dumbest movies ever made, but I just don’t care.

Every December, there’s at least three movies that I make a point to watch.

The first two are Eight Crazy Nights and Hebrew Hammer. These stem from a tradition that I had with my Jewish friend Pyri, where we’d smash beers, eat pizza, and watch the only two Hanukkah-related movies I could think of at the time that I came up with the tradition. Pyri’s been dead for five years now, but I still carry on the tradition myself, minus the beer because I quit drinking.

The other movie I always watch around Christmas is Elf. This shit is hilarious, and I have no idea why.

By all means, I should find Elf to be one of the most irritating Christmas films of all time. Everything about this movie is stupid and obnoxious, from the childish jokes to Will Ferrell’s bombastic over-enthusiasm to the generic “save Christmas with the power of holiday spirit” ending to having to listen to annoying idiots spew endless quotes from the movie. The only Christmas movie that has a more obnoxious fanbase than Elf is A Christmas Story.

But despite all that, I just can’t bring myself to hate it.

Look at this shit:

He’s pouring maple syrup onto spaghetti. There’s no reason at all that this should be funny, but it’s one of the most hilarious scenes in the movie. Is it Will’s delivery? Is it simply just the absurdity of a grown man putting syrup onto pasta? I have no idea, but I find it funny every damn time.

Then there’s the classic “You sit on a throne of lies!” scene. Buddy’s working at the Gimbels and sees the mall Santa. At first Buddy thinks it’s the real Santa, but quickly realizes it’s not and immediately starts berating him. During the ensuing chaos, Buddy screams “YOU SIT ON A THRONE OF LIES!” Again, the whole thing is so childish and ridiculous, but it never fails to make me laugh my ass off. Why? Fucked if I know, but it does.

My favorite scene in the whole movie by far though is when Buddy first arrives in New York City and comes across the crappy little coffee shop that says “World’s best coffee” on the window. Buddy goes inside and vehemently congratulates the employees on having the world’s best coffee. The whole scene lasts for probably no more than a single minute, but it’s hands down the funniest scene in the movie.

That scene stands on its own well enough, but later on Buddy takes Jovie on a date to the coffee shop. He blindfolds her and eagerly has her take a sip of the coffee. He asks her what she thinks, and she replies “It tastes like a crappy cup of coffee.” Buddy cheerfully replies “No, it’s the world’s best coffee!” Again, I find myself laughing my ass off and questioning myself why.

The entire movie feels like it was written by my nine year old nephew, but it’s still one of the most hilarious Christmas movies ever. Honestly, it’s probably all because of Will Ferrell’s delivery. Will is perfect for the role of Buddy the elf because, just like the movie, Will himself is funny even though he shouldn’t be. All he really does is act loud and crazy in most of his roles. There’s nothing particularly unique or clever about his style of comedy at all, and if it were anyone else I’d definitely find his schtick grating. But there’s just something about Ferrell that turns my brain off and gets me to laugh at his antics almost every time.

I think it’s this unexplainable charm that made Elf such a great movie and allowed it to become one of the best Christmas movies of all time. Without Will’s over-the-top performance, this movie would have been childish garbage. Who else is going to play a grown-ass man acting like a child on a constant sugar rush without annoying the shit out of the audience?

Elf is a dumb movie with childish jokes, and I probably lose braincells every time I watch it. But that’s okay. It’s okay to turn your brain off every now and then so you can laugh at stuff like a grown man putting syrup onto spaghetti or yelling at a mall Santa for being a fake. Not everything has to be highbrow and intellectually provocative.

Now I’m going to go watch Elf, I’m going to laugh my ass off like a retard, and I’m not going to feel ashamed for liking garbage.

Angry_Jerk

Adam “The Angry Jerk” Baker is the CEO of The AJnet Organization and Editor-in-Chief of AJnet Magazine. A grizzled internet veteran of over 20 years, he writes about politics, culture, and whatever else manages to annoy him that day.

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