A reader from Iran takes us up on our invitation.
Back in September, we published an email from Alex, a reader in Russia. You can read it for yourself here if you haven’t already, but the gist of the email was that Alex wanted us to know that most Russians don’t hate the US and don’t like their government or the war in Ukraine.
At the end of the article, we invited readers from countries that are considered America’s enemies to send us emails. Politicians and the media are always telling us that these people are our enemies. Since when did we trust those assholes to tell us the truth? AJnet Magazine wants to know what’s going on in so-called “enemy” countries like China or Iran. I mean, what’s really going on. What better way to hear it than from an average person in those countries?
We got a few emails. One email came to us all the way from North Korea. As it turns out, North Korea is right next door in Haddonfield, New Jersey, and North Koreans can write in perfect English, except for using the letter “L”, which they always replace with an R. Nice try, buddy.
We got a couple of similarly racist emails from people claiming to be from China. One mentioned eating cats and dogs and putting urine in our soda. The other claimed to be from a Chinese military general named Wang Ze Dong and threatened to nuke us. Both emails came from the state of Florida, and neither of them were really funny. We can match up our traffic logs with the times your emails were sent, doofus.
We did however get one legitimate email.
A reader from Iran using the initials AH took us up on our request and sent us an email. AH actually sent us this a couple of weeks after the article went up, but I’ve been kind of slacking on the whole “Letters to the Editor” thing, so I’m just now getting around to sharing it.
AH’s email is, by all appearances, legitimate. The site’s logs match up with the time it was sent, and the site has gotten regular traffic from Tehran for quite some time. If it’s a fake, then the faker at least put some effort into it and I’m willing to take the bait.
Hi AJ,
I am a longtime reader of Ajnet. I started reading your website in 2011. I find it because I was looking for website like Maddox (best page in the universe).. I read your website and Rantlister too. Rantlister is closed now but I am happy Angryjerk.net is not.
You posted a letter from Russia and ask readers from enemy countries to send you letters too. I live in Iran. United States bombs us so we must be an enemy country?
I tell you some about myself. I work in the government. I am not a important person but I talk to other workers who work for important people. Ayatollah Khamenei is not popular. Many in the government and military do not like him. They do not speak up though because they are afraid. Iran military generals are very loyal to Khamenei and follow orders well.. if you speak against the Ayatollah then you and your family is put in prison or killed. Do not say anything in public bad about him and you will be okay. When Khamenei dies there will be a power struggle with the military and the government.
Iranian people do not all hate Americans. I visit New York City and I think it is a very big and beautiful city. Americans are very friendly and like to talk. They are very helpful too when I was lost. Iran does not hate American people but we hate the American president who is dropping bombs on us with his master in Israel. Like you say in the Russia post, it is the governments who are the enemies of the world not the people. I agree that we send world leaders to fight instead of people. Let them die instead of us.
Thank you for saying the truth. I appreciate Ajnet and hope you put this letter on your website.
-AH
After 14 years you’re still reading this garbage. Why? Don’t they have anything better to do in Iran?
Nah I’m just messing with ya, AH. Thank you for being such a loyal reader for all these years.
I’m kind of glad it was someone from Iran who took me up on my offer. I already have an idea of what’s going on in China (our company has an employee who grew up in mainland China and still has family there; China is surprisingly cool and normal for the most part, aside from that whole “Don’t criticize the government” thing), and I doubt the five people in all of North Korea who actually have access to the global internet will ever find this site. I don’t know any Iranians, so your email is the closest thing I have to an Iranian’s point of view.
Did America really even bomb Iran? I guess technically we did, since we attacked their nuclear sites. But I’m pretty sure Israel did most of the heavy hitting during that whole kerfuffle, they were the ones who actually bombed Tehran.
In any case, I’m glad to hear that most Iranians understand that the American people aren’t their enemy. I’m even gladder to hear that nobody actually likes the Ayatollah. It’s bad enough that we have a bunch of geriatric senile fucks running the show, but the Ayatollah takes that a step further by throwing religion into the mix. I’d wager that the majority of young Iranians want nothing to do with that shit and are Muslims in the same sense that many Christians are just people who believe in Jesus and maybe go to church sometimes during the holidays. I thought the Ayatollah had a designated successor picked out though, so I don’t know why there would really be a power struggle when he dies. I guess you’d know better than I would though, especially if you really work in the Iranian government (for all I know this email could be the Iranian equivalent of “My dad works at Nintendo”). We can be sure that Mossad will be heavily involved in any Iranian power struggle.
It’s so funny to hear foreigners talk about how friendly and sociable Americans are. I’ve talked to a lot of people from different countries over the years, and they all seem to say the same thing, that Americans are very friendly and outgoing compared to people in their own countries. I’ve talked to people from Mexico, Europe, China, and the Middle East, and they’re always so surprised that Americans make small talk with strangers. As an American I don’t understand it, I think we’re a bunch of angry miserable dicks, but apparently the rest of the world doesn’t see it that way.
I’ve visited New York City a couple of times (I think I have a disposable camera lying around somewhere with pictures of the NYC skyline with the Twin Towers still in it, doubt the pictures are any good at this point), and I’d hardly call it beautiful. It’s definitely big though, and I remember Manhattan being a fucking maze. Still, it’s the largest and busiest city in the country, one of the largest financial hubs in the world, and the nightlife is insane, so I guess I understand the appeal to foreign tourists. I’m still mystified why I see so many foreign tourists visit Philly. All we’ve really got are cheesesteaks, an alright art museum, and a giant bell with a crack in it.
I appreciate you taking me up on my invitation and giving myself and our readers a little perspective from Iran, and I really appreciate your loyalty as a reader since the early days of the site. I hope the Iranian people don’t have to suffer too much more bullshit from their leaders and from Israel, and I hope that when the Ayatollah croaks you get a big fat promotion.
Tâ ba’d.
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