Tupac Shakur sucked, and the only reason everyone loves him is because he died.
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Spider-Man 3: Pure Unadulterated Garbage
I managed to get a free bootleg copy of Spider-Man 3, and all I can say is I’m glad I didn’t spend anything to see it.
The Dead Kennedys pwn
The Dead Kennedys are the greatest punk rock band ever, and if you disagree you’re a fucking piece of shit.
I’m glad the Eagles didn’t win the Super Bowl
Philly sports fans were highly disappointed that the Eagles didn’t go to the Super Bowl this year. I wasn’t.
The Bible is Boring (I Should Be God)
The Bible is a boring snooze-fest, and the universe would be a better place if I was God.